I'll Love You Forever!

Dear Brian,

(The following is a love note I wrote on Valentine's Day 2008, but it bears repeating to remind you of some of the reasons I love you today, on our 23rd wedding anniversary.)

Valentine's Day twenty years ago is a day that still stands out in my mind even after all these years. We were on the beautiful tropical island of Guam where we had met a few months before. It was a Sunday afternoon and we had enjoyed lunch together. A few days before that you had announced to me that you loved me, and wanted to commmit yourself to loving me for the rest of my life! Such honesty and, forgive the term, *purpose-driven dating* was quite new to me and I was surprised by your forthrightness! And yet, in the five months that I had known you I had come to recognize this as characteristic of your life. You are still the most clear thinking and articulate person I have ever met!

So, I had been mulling your declaration over and over in my mind and the question that I asked you that Valentine's Day was, "How do you know that I am the one?" Your reply was that biblical love is a commitment made once the whole person had been objectively evaluated, good and bad, and based on everything that you knew about me, you were ready to make that commitment! Well, it only took a few minutes to let you know that my secret list of all I had prayed for in "Mr. Wonderful" had already been checked off as I had gotten to know you, and if it really was that clear and simple, then, wow!... "I love you, too!"

That was a nice start, and you have been teaching me about Biblical love for 20 years now in many ways....

I love how you are so committed to teaching me and our children the Word of God. You continue on reading the Bible to us, taking the interruptions and distractions in stride, and looking forward in faith to the great things that God will do with His word in our lives. I also love how you constantly talk to us about what you are studying and learning.

I love how you show that you are thinking about me even when we are apart. When you call me just to check in and offer an encouraging word to press on, or show up with my favorite dark chocolate treat, you are saying, “You are on my mind!”

I love how you joyfully shoulder the responsibility of being Dad to our eight children. I know that it is a great task and no one is able to do it to God’s glory without His enabling. And so you have continued to ask for strength and wisdom and God is using you greatly in the lives of all of our kids.

I love how you have set the example of dealing graciously with people. You have taught me so much about this through your example with our children. Often you have diffused a conflict or soothed an upset child by your gracious words and your humility that allows you to ask forgiveness and see their side.

I love how you have loved me enough to confront sin when you see it, and show me a more God-honoring way. Recently you pointed out that I needed to work on “sweetness of speech” with one of our children. Your admonition was needed and the loving way that you brought it to my attention made it easy to see that you were right. Thanks!

I love how integrity guides you. Your example of striving to do what is right (in little and big things) will be a great legacy for our children. I have told you often that it is quite convicting to live with you at times…and that is certainly to my great benefit!

I also love how willing you have always been to make sacrifices for our family. I am astounded and so grateful for the amount of time that you have given to lead our 14 year homeschool venture! Your leadership over this and actually overseeing the high school years has made this dream a reality.

Brian, I am so thankful for the opportunity to tell the world that you are a great gift of love, protection, wisdom, and blessing to me straight from the hand of the Lord. I am forever changed because of it.

I love you so much,

Myra

Read More

Worth it All

...That amazing moment of unspeakable joy when your grown children thank you for all the years you spent homeschooling them, giving them a happy childhood, and building a good relationship with them.

*deep, joyful sigh*

Read More

My New Little Toy

I received an unexpected sum of money this week, and was able to make a purchase I've been contemplating for a while now. I bought an MP3 player and have spent the evening loading all my favorite music cds on to it. I am expecting some new cds to arrive any day now and can hardly wait to add them to the collection. Music really has an impact on me, and so I'm thankful that I can now carry the music of Sovereign Grace, Steven Curtis Chapman, Tenth Avenue North, Chris Tomlin, Caedmon's Call, Casting Crowns, Peter Furler, Starfield, and an old favorite, Wayne Watson -- in my pocket! :-)

Read More

Thoughts about Hospitality

Hospitality, at its heart, is reaching out and welcoming people into your life. That can be done in so many ways, and at many different times. We have had times where we invited another family over and all sat down to dinner together. I usually make something simple that feeds a lot of people for little money, like a crockpot of chili or soup, or a tray of chicken baked in the oven with bread and salad. Or if we have guests after church, we will run by Little Ceasar's and get some of their $5 pizzas.

But other times, I've had a friend stop by for an hour in the middle of the afternoon and served nothing but a glass of cold water. We were freed to just talk and pray briefly without the work of serving a meal or cleaning up afterward.

One great thing about having people over so much is that it has moved me past feeling like each meal has to be a big production. Some of our sweetest times of hospitality have been when someone came by that we didn't expect and we foraged the leftovers together, or threw together some grilled cheese sandwiches. People are not coming to see how a gourmet meal is prepared and served. They are coming to be loved by you, and you can do that by just offering whatever you have, though it is simple.

Read More

Hands

I have never really cared for the way my hands look. Age and years of washing things, (children, dishes, etc.) hasn't helped my hands look younger or...um, less used. But I have to say that I am extremely thankful that God gave me able hands. They have served me well for 46 years now, and I am thankful for all the meaningful labor that those worn hands have now had the privilege of doing. A couple of days ago, my photographer daughter took some photos for one of her classes, and of all things, she wanted to photograph my hands.

To see what she had in mind for her project, click here and you can check out her photography blog. After reading the very sweet and gracious things she had to say, I am more thankful for my hands than ever. :-)

Read More

The Rhino and the Dove

My missionary friend from South Africa said something very insightful the other day. She was talking about lessons learned in ministry, and quoted this anonymous saying, "You need to have the skin of a rhinocerous, but the heart of a dove."

That made an immediate picture in my mind! The rhino's thick, armor-like skin provides a degree of protection for him, and is not easily injured. The dove is known for its loyalty, and unlike most creatures in the animal kingdom, it picks a mate for life, and remains true to that one.

The correlation from this saying to loving people and a life of ministry is easily made. Being around people means that there will be some conflict, some hurts, and some choices to be made daily if we are really going to love others the way Christ has loved us. Because of my sinfulness, I find it too easy to be bothered by all the offenses that happen in a day, and begin to respond

selfishly, either returning evil for evil, or withholding good from those responsible for the offense.

I am so grateful for the power of Christ that has freed me from my slavery to that kind of sin! Though there is temptation and struggle at times, it is not my master anymore!

*deep sigh of relief*

Instead, I'm so thankful for the power of the Holy Spirit that enables us to respond to the gracious mercy we've been shown by being gracious to others. My offenses before our Holy God were much worse than anything I've suffered here! How humbling!

So, my prayer is that I will remember the rhino, and his thick skin, and even better the command to let love cover a multitude of sins. And further, that I will have the loyal love displayed by the dove to its mate, and love others, graciously and patiently, persevering in deeds of kindness, especially when they are undeserved.

Let Gospel love drive us!

Read More

Gospel Powered Parenting

A friend and I have been reading a book together by William Farley called Gospel Powered Parenting. In his first chapter, Intellectual Submarines, Farley discusses the unseen assumptions that cruise just below the surface of our lives but drive how we think and act.

He says that godly parents operate from the following 5 assumptions as they face the task of raising children.

1. Parenting is not easy. We cannot be perfect parents. "Precisely because we are so flawed, the gospel, the saving work of Christ, must be your refuge." (p. 20)

2. God is sovereign, but He uses means. God is completely in control of salvation, but He loves to use parents to bring salvation to their children. We are utterly dependent and responsible at the same time.

3. A good offense is better than defense. We must focus on preparing our children to enter the world and conquer it through saving faith in Jesus Christ, not merely protecting them from it. We must show our children through our lives and teach them through our words that Christ is more glorious and satisfying than anything here.

"We aimed all our arrows at our children's hearts, knowing that once their hearts had been changed, the decisive battle was fought and won." (p. 26) This is what the new birth is all about.

4. Understand the new birth. If our children have only adopted a religious, moralistic, works-righteousness philosophy, they will be no different from the world. Only when they are born again will they follow Christ and his word. "New birth is a radical change of heart that ushers in new desires, new loves, and a new life direction." (p. 28)

5. Effective parents are not child centered. They strive instead to put God at the center of their family. Having a God-centered family means saying no to kids when it is in their best interest, husband and wife are united before their kids, marriage is a higher priority than kids, and there is a willingness to be different from the world.

After almost 22 years of trying by God's grace (though as flawed sinners) to follow these 5 principles, I can say "Amen" to everything he said in this chapter! God has been moving us more and more over the years to cast all our hope for our children on Christ and His transforming work in their hearts. I feel deeply the responsibility I have to do everything possible to give them the Word as much as possible, live it out before them in a gracious, humble way, and pray for God to save and sanctify them. Ultimately though, it is all up to Him, and I am astounded and humbled to know that He wants to use me. WOW!

I hope you will pick up this book and catch a vision for the wonderful work God desires to do in you and in the lives of your children.

Read More